The #1 reason the RTO mandates fail and what to do about it

When asked nicely a year ago to return to work in person (RTO), many employees complied. Companies promised employees coming back to the office benefits of spontaneous conversations, teambuilding, collaboration, and mentoring,

Although skeptical that all of those things require being in person, people packed up their laptops at home, dressed in hard pants and shoes, made the commute, unpacked in their corporate offices, and got to work. Every once in a while, they ran into someone, but for the most part, people drove all the way to the office just to work the same way they did from their home offices.

They were alone in an office attending virtual meetings.

Promises made about how great it will be when everyone returns to the office were not reality. Yes, there were fun and games and free pizza lunches; however, those things do not make a culture.

⚫ Their bosses were not there to stop by or mentor. Top leaders weren’t making the same effort to be in the office, so why should everyone else, people wondered.

⚫  There were few in-person development opportunities because most were one-offs or online. Bosses were not inviting them to in-person meetings to learn or contribute something special.

 ⚫ There were very few useful team meetings or brainstorms for valuable purposes. Those are planned so people can prepare, research, bring ideas, and think about next steps.

After a few weeks, people resisted coming in to the office.

Why make the effort to haul the laptop in, suffer the commute, and wear hard pants all day, for an hour of phony teambuilding games and free pizza? Then to work the same way they would at home?

Employees want to come into the office when there is something scheduled and work from home the other times.

That spurred some companies to track employees’ work time, monitor computer usage, require login times, and threaten termination.

Some leaders took up the RTO battle so forcefully, it became the priority blinding them to other issues.

Recently, Salesforce, the $31.4 billion CRM company with 79k employees (Source: Forbes), tried a different tactic: emotional manipulation. For ten days starting this past Monday, the company would donate $10 for every day any employee came to the office.

Those mandates and manipulations are missing the boat.

Employees would want what was promised about RTO: mentoring, learning opportunities, engagement with leaders and each other (for the most part), team building, and brainstorms with purpose.

They do not want to be treated like children. The oversite that comes with being in person is stifling and insulting, yet many managers reverted back to old-fashioned micromanagement as soon as the pandemic ended.

People have changed. Management needs to change too.

No thirty-year old wants to ask permission to go to the dentist or justify leaving early to coach their kid’s soccer game.

Picture the conversation:

• Employee: “Can I leave an hour early next Monday to go to my kid’s soccer game across town?”

• Manager: “Sure. Are you going to skip lunch or come in an hour early that day to make up the time?”

• Employee: “Well, I worked late every day last week on the Travis project.”

• Manager: “Yeah, but how will you make up the time next week?”

Employees recognize that level of micromanagement as distrust.

It disconnects them from the manager, team, and company. A few of those incidents among the team prompt resume updates. It leads to disengagement and departures.

Don’t get it wrong.

People do not mind advising coworkers and managers that they will arrive late or leave early. Professionals from shift workers to customer service reps to HR generalists and accountants understand the need to get the work done and to be there for the team.

It’s the asking for permission part that feels intrusive and childish to grown adults.

When you want people to RTO, update your management style and make it worth it.

Here are three actions you can take to make RTO worthwhile for your people:

1.  Be there too. Be in the office, get your coffee in the break room, grab a group to go out for lunch, and talk to people when you see them around.

2.  Get to know the people you see. Walk around, ask about their day and work. Engage in small talk to show you care, build your network, and identify ways to help people.

3.  Connect people to opportunities. As you engage in small talk and get to know people, you will be able to identify work, learning, and networking opportunities that will be valuable to them. Seek opportunities to connect people so they can contribute, grow, and help others.

The more you are present, engage, and connect others, the better you can inspire people to want to be in the office. You can help create the sense of belonging and purpose people desperately seek right now. (Source: Mayo Clinic)

Inspiring will yield better results for the company than threats of termination will. It will improve your influence as a leader too.

 
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Sources:
Forbes.com Profile: Salesforce.com
https://www.forbes.com/companies/salesforce/?sh=6483e83e7a2b

 Is having a sense of belonging important?
Mayo Clinic Health System
December 2021
https://www.mayoclinichealthsystem.org/hometown-health/speaking-of-health/is-having-a-sense-of-belonging-important

There’s no crying in baseball…even if you’re the umpire

Being a baseball umpire must be tough. Sure, most of the calls are obvious. But, there are always a few calls during every game that get the teams and crowds riled up. Umpires never get applauded. They get yelled at. They get things thrown at them from the crowd. It is a thankless job.

All of that pressure brings to mind business leaders.

There are many similarities between business leaders and baseball umpires: both have to make quick decisions, stay composed under pressure, maintain order and authority, and ensure the performance follows the rules.

The most significant similarity is judgment.

Both jobs spend a lot of time judging others.

Leaders, like umpires, have to make decisions that affect outcomes. Leaders have to judge people and situations, and often do so quickly, with minimal information to make the decisions.

Honing the ability to judge is useful for leaders. It is not a skill one learns by age two, like how to walk. It’s more like how to swing a bat. You can learn it at age two, but to be really good at it takes years of practice and fine-tuning.

Leaders who are good at judgement can have positive effects on their teams:

1. Capitalize on talent: By judging others, leaders can identify talent and potential within their teams. Seeing strengths and weaknesses enables top leaders to put the right people in the right jobs, delegate effectively, and optimize team performance. It also helps leaders coach people for their future beyond the team.

2. Build performance: Judging others enables leaders to know where performance standards can be set and how to hold their teams accountable to the standards. The standards can become motivational for the teams and for individual growth.

3. Speed inovation and progress: Leaders who can judge wisely, discern, and make effective decisions are more likely to move quicker than others who need more meetings, more input, more data. The speed of innovation, response to customers, and progress matters, and the ability to judge contributes to it.

There are two significant negative effects when judging others goes unchecked:

1. Biased decisions: Leaders who do not guard against their own biases may overlook valuable perspectives or ideas, thus, sabotage innovation and progress.

2. Toxic culture: Judging can lead to lack of empathy and a disconnect between the leader and others, which can lead to people feeling insecure and constantly scrutinized. There can be a disconnect between the leader and others. There also can become a disconnect between employees and each other when judgment pits people against each other.

There is a fine line for leaders who use judgement wisely and those who do not.

Here are a few ways leaders can walk that line and stay on the positive, useful side of it:

1. Show empathy above all. To everyone.

2. Jump to positive conclusions about others before negative ones. Starting with positive enables you to go faster because when conversations begin with positive, the other person is more likely to join them.

3. MYOB. Mind Your Own Business. Do not judge others on things unrelated to the work team. You do not need to have an opinion about their hobbies, kids’ sports or schools, or spouse’s cooking. Free yourself from the weight of all of that by not judging things that do not impact the team.

4. Foster an inclusive culture deliberately. When people feel included, they are more likely to let you know you missed something in your decision-making. Without it, they check their brains and hearts at the door, and you’re on your own. (Plus, people bring ideas and all kinds of other great things that help beyond the subject of this post!)

5. Keep your mouth closed more often. Literally. Let others talk more. Listen more. If you stop talking, they are more likely to share in ways that can help you be more discerning.

Leaders affect whether their own teams/companies win or lose.

That’s a gigantic difference from umpires, whose detached objectivity does not affect themselves. The fact that a leader’s judgment impacts their own team is further support for honing the ability to think critically and take the five actions above.  

Leaders who take those five actions may cry with their teams, but their tears will be tears of joy and their pain be champagne!

3 lessons learned from McDonald’s Kiosk Training Level 1 (that I made up for my Dad)

My dad has been quite a trailblazer throughout his career. He had an office in our home long before WFH was the hot demand. He created new models for sports management and auto financing, among other things that became commonplace years later. In recent years, he has worked to become as tech savvy as he needs to be—no less, no more.

Last week, was a big one: Dad wanted to learn how to use the kiosk at McDonald’s.

He goes to the same McDonald’s every morning and called upon me as the family leadership development expert to teach him how to order from the kiosk. Here are the three key lessons I learned throughout this ordeal, I mean, wonderful experience😊:

Lesson #1: Put others at ease by linking the new experience to a familiar one. In advance of the training he asked of me, we spoke about similar experiences he had. For example, he had ordered from Amazon online. He described the steps he took during that process, and I said it would be similar on the kiosk. He had seen the kiosk, so we also talked about how it might differ. The discussion gave him comfort and calmed any internal anxiety he may have had. We all have some anxiety when tackling something new, right? Putting him at ease in advance was helpful because he was less anxious when we arrived at the kiosk training.

Lesson #2: Confirm the intention and purpose. Repeat the purpose to ensure clarity, and listen to the other person. We had some confusion about this one. I thought the purpose was to learn to order on the kiosk, but the very specific purpose Dad had was to get coffee for $.99 using the kiosk.

In my excitement for him to learn something new, I did not listen well, and it impacted the training.

Once the lesson began, Dad was rolling along pressing dine in, coffee café, regular coffee, and hold up! The price was $1.39. The kiosk did not say anything about $.99 coffee. He realized an ad he saw for the app promised the lower price for coffee. I offered to download the app on my phone right then, but he was frustrated already. He could not accomplish his purpose, so he was finished with the lesson.

I was frustrated because he still wanted the coffee—and so did I!—but he did not finish the order. He walked away from the kiosk to use his gift card at the counter instead.

I was bummed because he did not finish learning how to use the kiosk. He was bummed because coffee would not be $.99. There would have been less frustration if we had been perfectly clear about the intention ahead of time.

(For the record, the frustration level was like a two out of ten. We were laughing, not angry. We realized the moment and were not taking it seriously.)

Lesson #3: Be clear about the measure of success. Clarity of purpose impacts measure of performance. Since he did not complete the training, the special pretend Certificate of Achievement made especially for him on Canva sat secretly in my handbag. He was not going to get the certificate because he did not complete the order via the kiosk.

He did learn some of the steps, and that was a big deal for him. He got far enough to view the menu, select his preferred item, and place the order. Upon further consideration, he did earn the certificate for McDonald’s Kiosk Training Level 1!

Acknowledging progress was important. Look how proud he is! (He was being extra corny, but still!) There was no need to hold back the fake certificate just because the training did not go as planned.

Lighten up and look for opportunities to praise progress. Don’t be stingy with praise when it has been earned.

The praise, along with clarifying the purpose and connecting the training to something familiar, will help when we return in a few days for McDonald’s Kiosk Training Level 2!

Are there situations you’re facing when the same three lessons would be useful:

1. Put the other person at ease by linking the new thing with something familiar. This could be if you are asking for a budget increase for new staff or to improve a product feature.

2. Clarify the purpose of meetings. Wow, this is an enormous time-saver. I bet it would reduce the need for half of the meetings on our calendars! If the purpose is to give information, send an email instead. If the purpose is to gain support, do the topics and timing align with that purpose?

3. Link purpose to metrics to performance. Be clear with everyone about what success looks like. This can save time also because people will be working together to accomplish one thing instead of having different goals.

 A little reflection about those in advance can save time, build relationships, and speed progress. Every leader can use those now, including trailblazers learning new things.

Leadership Lesson from our dog: the best way to handle conflict

The sound of our dog getting sick got me up extra early yesterday. As we sat together while the rest of the house slept, I pondered the many things Bebe has taught me our six years together

One of the most important things she has taught me is to go toward conflict. That's not the same as to love conflict. Let me explain what she does, what she taught.

Maybe your dog does this too.

As the Chief Wellness Officer, Bebe is within a few feet of me in my home office every day, as many of you know from our Zoom meetings.

Throughout the work day, Bebe needs attention, a treat, or a walk. Most of the time, I need a break too, and we take fifteen minutes together. But, on extremely rare occasions, her needs are too frequent, she becomes whiney, and my patience wears thin.

Of course, I do not react harshly to beloved Bebe. But my annoyance is poorly masked as I repeatedly tell her to wait.

The amazing thing she does, the lesson, is: When she knows I am annoyed, she comes to me. She goes toward the conflict.

 When the natural tendency would be to shrink from it, give a stern side-eye, and sulk out of the room, Bebe comes to me instead.

She wants to be sure we are good at all times, even when she recognizes frustration. The funniest thing happens when she comes to me: I apologize to her, pet and kiss her, give treats, and go for a longer walk!

The conflict works out better for us both.

I noticed this behavior a few years ago and have put it into practice with people I care about.

Now, obviously, there aren't too many people I work with who love me as much as Bebe does, or vice versa, but it works!

Go toward the conflict when you feel it. Get back in sync. Make sure people know you didn't mean to be annoying, frustrated, or rude. Or, if they were frustrated, touch base about what’s up with them. Stop by, call, or send an e-mail to clear the air and move forward with grace and greatness. You might notice the relationship is even stronger afterward.

Some wording to consider could be…

• “My apologies for being frustrated earlier. The timeline change made me nervous, but we are on top of it and there’s nothing to worry about after all. Thanks for your understanding.”

• “It sounded like you may have been concerned about the timeline earlier. Can I help?”

Wording that does not help…

• “I’m sorry if you were put off by my frustration earlier.”

Do you see how that apology does not take responsibility for my behavior? Don’t blame them for your rudeness or for noticing it. Take responsibility for your behavior and appreciate their understanding, if that was the case. No more, no less.

Bebe has taught me many things about leadership, friendship, and love. Sometimes I marvel at how simple the lessons are when I just slow down and pay attention like on a Sunday morning.

The world would be better if we could all be the persons our dogs think we are. I’m going to work on that more.

The truth about Google's culture and 5 take-aways for all company leaders

When companies make the news, there often is more going on than meets the eye, and the truth comes out eventually.

For example, Google was the darling of company culture for years with its nap pods, slides, free food, dry cleaning, bikes, and on-site clinics. And more. Google became the standard and inspired all the Silicon Valley tech companies, along with companies all over the country, to one-up each other with their cool offerings to get top talent to join.

To the un-trained eye, it looked like Google cared so much about its employees. Just a year ago, Google touted its increased parental and caretaker leave policy as the Chief People Officer said they wanted to offer “extraordinary benefits” for their people.

Apparently, as Google expanded its leave and staff, it did so without any strategic thinking about its stakeholders, especially its customers. Now, it’s parent company is in the middle of laying off 12,000 employees. As laid off Googlers exit, they get 16 weeks of severance, along with two weeks of pay for every year of employment with Google.

The severance is decent, but one issue came to light last week.

Late last week, Google was in the news for not honoring that new leave policy for people who have been laid off during their approved leave. For example, one woman who just had a baby learned via text that her job was eliminated, along with her maternity leave. Just one hundred people are affected, yet Google is not covering what it said it would cover. (Source: CNBC, Google nixes paying out remainder of maternity and medical leave for laid-off employees, by Jennifer Elias, March 17, 2023)

People plan their lives around company promises, yet Google gave no regard to the promises made to their people. That’s a warning to all current and future employees: you cannot trust Google.

To someone highly experienced with company culture, it was clear as Google’s culture grew from being “bros in a garage” to manipulating people so they would work longer hours and stay with the company longer.

It was never about the people. Google proved it. Pay attention and learn from them.

Five lessons to learn from Google’s culture behavior this week:

1. Strategic planning is crucial when adding people. Strategic thinking would consider what happens if/when customer demand changes. If Google, and Meta, DocuSign, Twilio, and others, had been more strategic prior to hiring all the extra people over the past few years, they would not be in the midst of the downsizing now.

2. Align your company culture with values it intends to keep. List the values and how those values are lived every day—be specific, not pollyanna’ish. Then, design the culture to support the values.

3. Be honest when promoting your company values and culture. Your company doesn’t have to be fun and creative. Lots of people do not want to work at a high-energy place like Google. Understand your culture and communicate about it honestly. At least that way, you are more likely able to keep your promises.

4. Keep your promises. If your policy says people get leave, and someone applies for it, and it is approved, honor that promise. Backing out alerts people to the fact that you do not keep promises. And, they will relate to you accordingly.

5. If you care about your people, then care about your people honestly. You can share hard news, but don’t lie or cover up downward trends. When cultures are really about manipulation, the undercurrent of distrust will infiltrate everything. It takes up so much time and stifles anything good.

Sometimes companies succeed in spite of their practices instead of because of them.

Google will survive this PR disaster. It will go on to make billions for its CEO and investors. It could do more good, like it says it wants to, if it approached its culture more genuinely. Companies can do both: care about people and profit. There’s all kinds of research that proves it—you can google it.